We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
Spotted at kelly concert- 10 year old in a homemade "I do not hook up" t shirt. Well I should certainly hope not, sweetheart.
Did I tell you that you looked cute last night? I looked at the pictures. I lied.
after the first, "yea you like that baby", i quickly remembered why i had stopped having sex with him.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
My patience ran out after you started clapping at the strippers everytime they took off a piece of clothing.
Woke up in my own bed with a "New Years Eve 2011" bar bracelet on. Both of these things confuse me.
You told me you aren't worried about the police that you've been training for this an that the last three months of your life have been devoted to building up your stun gun tolerance and pepper spray recovery time.
Have the decency to NOT HANG YOU'RE USED CONDOM ON THE FOOSEBALL HANDLES! Dickhead.
There's no such thing as shame in your world, is there?
I love how encouraging you are, but I need you to stop me when the guy I'm going home with is a dead ringer for Nick Cage.
HIS DICK IS SO AWESOME DUDE. 15/10 SURPRISE
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
got cock blocked by the cops again. two of the cops were the same ones from that t bell incident and they recognized me... they still dont like me
I like that they’re all named Christopher or Chris. No need to worry about moaning during!
Randomize
