before i die, we are going to oregon and playing oregon trails for real. like putting things in a hat & people will pull out whether they live or die. and they die of fun things like typhoid, dysentary, or hunting accident.
I could tell by the way he was holding my hand that he really liked you
i woke up in the lobby of Holiday Inn on a chair sitting up straight
I just did my online traffic school at the bar. No biggie.
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
I actually enjoy jerking off to her facebook more than I enjoy actually fucking her. Just something with our generation
hand shaped bruises on both boobs again....i wish i could say this is the first time.
Then you started screaming that this was the first time you did e and that you had a 4.8 gpa, that was right before you almost suffocated between that one girl's tits.
Good news! I don't have Hep C! Better news! I still hate you!
Dude that soap I drank last night is fucking killing me.
I can't even masturbate anymore!! That was my last source of cardio!!
If someone told me one person in the department was secretly a death eater, I would suspect her, no contest.
I'm so cold without your freakishly high body temperature
that's the equivalent to a normal girlfriends. 'I miss you' btw
See, this is why we give you shit. Ashley gets her car cleaned out, I get multiple enchiladas made, and you get cum in your eye.
I kinda forgave him after he laid next to me and rubbed my arm for four hours while I tripped balls.
Randomize
