I have had sex with more partners than how old he is.
woke up to an unread text message i sent to myself: "brreakfdast..pork and ice cream."
He woke up screaming about pickles. I think it's gonna be a good day.
From what I remember, he had one ball. But it was cute
Do you ever just look at me and get embarrassed?
You sat there for 20minutes trying to seduce the picture of my dad.
I kept trying to give you water and you kept spitting it back at me. You looked like a camel. People were staring
He ate me out like a beaver on a tree. I've never been so scared in my life
idk, it started getting weird when they were looking up videos of lesbian giraffes
Just drove by where I lost my sausage gravy virginity
How exactly does a handjob become fancy?
Blueberry lube, and champagne.
Just let me suck your dick and be happy. Let me have this.
Peeing in taco bell cups is part of the fun of going to taco bell
VIVE LA RESISTANCE
Oh god, what now?
You yelled "Shame!" like you were that bitch from Game of Thrones and then hit my balls full force with your sports bra
Randomize
