I reminded them that I didn't puke and I cleaned yours up! So huh!
He bought me ice cream and then I gave him a bj
I think that's fair trade off
i just woke up and its 10 o'clock and the words "Robbies Fave Restraunt" and written in sharpie above my vage. Help me.
So not only just find my adoption papers that I didnt know about in my parents house, but they say "child shows some signs of mental retardation".
He just brought me a wine glass. Full of Tequila. Ignore any texts after this one.
Not enough clothes on. Not enough vagina. Not enough drugs in my body.
good it was pretty cute, also what would bong water do to a puppy?
I only got lap dances from the ugliest strippers, i couldnt stop myself from laughing the entire time.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
He talked for 3 hours straight on how his dad is a dentist how fuck do you think my night was
Like the friend zone has no room for winks
Would you think less of me if I said I was eating a toaster strudel in the bath.
I'm bleeding and have questions
My manager gave me an envelope with money in it before he had vacation, and when I asked what it was for, he said it will be his bail money.
Did you have a good sleep?
if a good sleep includes waking up cuddling a bottle of wine I had a GREAT sleep
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