lets have sex before this no shave november shit gets outta hand.
Im watching someone hooking up in the library
procrastination at its finest
My RA just gave me tips on how to have discreet shower sex. Were we that loud?
I'don't know who your are but its that time a day. Drunk it up. Did you buy a House for goundhogs days?
and then he proceeded to take what he called, a whip cream shower.
I saved him as teletubby in my phone....that can't be a good sign. I'm not answering.
He's used the term "balls deep" 3 times in the first hour. Thanks a lot, Plenty of Fish.
I got pulled into the conversation by "she sleeps with everybody" then "she" involved sleeping with "cocks the size of a viva burrito"
BRILLIANT IDEA: In honor of summer olympics we need to start a synchronized drinking team.
Returning my drunken purchases from last night. Not a single thing I bought was on sale.
Reports of my death were greatly exaggerated.
It bothers me when I see my old fuck buddies starting families on Facebook.
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
Just by hearing the girl outside reciting the info on her fake ID, I know it's gonna be a good night
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