Have fun with your cool freestyling girlfriend!
She can rap better than you any day
so the car was packed with everything from my dorm, plus my mom. during the 6 hour trip home she found my kama sutra. started flippin through it.....
oh shit that had to have been awkward
i thought so too. until she asked what the check marks were for
Just bought purple Ray Bans. If there was any small chance that I would ever have sex with women ever again, I just buried it.
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
i've decided that sluts are like cars. they may look good as hell on the outside, but you never know what kind of shit is hiding under the hood.
Just got to school and somone already mentioned the amount of cereal im carrying.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I found your Halloween costume. I think you shit yourself last night
I'm not pregnant. Security came before he could.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
Last night I woke up and the national rep of his frat was sucking my toe.
My eczema on my back is flaring up so he rubbed coconut oil on it while we were boning down. If that's not a picture of 8 years married I dunno what is.
Are you in a good mood because I stuffed you with enchiladas, ice cream, penis, and cuddles last night?
The 666th photo in my phone is of him and if that's not a sign that he's secretly the Antichrist, idk what is. Also, bring more rum.
What color nail polish screams, "Either fuck me or get the hell out of my way"?
Randomize
