I think we should urban dictionary "drive of shame." It involves a sprint to your car in his underwear and shirt, surreptitiously trying to put on your bra on at stoplights without attracting attention from neighboring cars, and lurking in your car a block from home so you can know when your roommate leaves for work.
I wanted to tell him he wasn't actually in me, but my god, awkward?
new revelation: five guys for breakfast
new revelation: previous revelation not a good revelation
Btw, whenever you feel discouraged about your life, think about me being frantically upset bc my mobile porn site limited me to only 5 videos a day
You misunderstood me....i wasnt asking and it is not negotiable
You're making this sound more like a hostage situation than a booty call.
If I don't survive tonitght I would like to thank you for the ricekrispy treats. I am majestic
What we have is to special to throw away over a woman who spreads her butt cheeks on a pool table for me...
When you are 21 it's acceptable to run out of the tavern and puke all over the bike rack... when you are 35 it's called alcoholism.
So i just remembered that thing i use to do with your butt because of shark week.
I emptied a Vyvance capsule into my coffee pot last night and set the auto start. Pretty sure I've been drinking meth all morning
He accepted my bet of 5 bucks to bike home completely naked. Never got asked about the 5 bucks, guess he enjoyed it too much
My mom heard me having sex with my boyfriend but thought it was the neighbors. She commented on how quick it was. I just nodded and changed the subject
Everyone in Columbus is two degrees of separation from my vagina.
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
He thought it would be sexy if he found my clothes and dressed me, and it was..until he found a thong under his bed and assumed it was mine. It wasn't
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