Do the low cut shirt test. If he stares at your tits even in front of your brother, he's down.
Just used a champagne bottle to outline a trigonometric circle for math 104.. should i give up on life now or later?
He's been grabbing my ass as a greeting since 2004, sex was overdue
Whatever. I'm saving myself for my wedding night or a night with enough patron.
at the last minute we also decided to throw an egg in the beer bong. and he drank it, shell and all.
She just told me her legs are numb and that she dedicated her karaoke of ice ice baby to her 4 month old son.
It was like watching porn, except it was in real life, and it was starring two of your best friends.
I just gave a bum a ride back to his bench. Columbus is weird but I like it.
He's sending me pics of Yellowstone scenery...the only thing I can think is "I would have sex next to that waterfall"
Notice how both of our plans for hooking up with these guys involve getting them drunk?
Oh my God, we're like men but with great boobs.
I think he just tried to put your boyfriend in a trashcan....
Weird, Jen didn't know mixers were solely for coloring purposes. Don't call me an alcoholic because you're uneducated
Did we do drunk science last night? There's tequila in the test tubes...
he fucked me while wearing his "Reagan Bush '84" tank and my inner democrat has never been more disappointed
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
