If I saw her on the street and didn't know about the two of them, I would think the only way she'd ever find love was if she somehow found her way to middle earth and an orc took her in
Dude, everyone in your family has slept with that girl. Her vagina is like the Hindu version of a Bar Mitzvah.
He gave her the shocker .. I didn't know people really did that.
You guys better make it up to the cabin in time for mud wrestling on Saturday. I'm not kidding. You know when I joke, and now is not one of those times.
Throwing up out both ends. This is not how I pictured adulthood.
I'm just gonna get real fat and join the circus.
By the way seagulls wings are very soft. And the lesbian and or by sexual twins say hello. Be home in the little bit time frame.
I have a vague memory of you tryin to ride a unicycle through jimmy johns
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
Is this what it's like to be an adult? You plan out play dates for your vagina?
Men are too sensitive. They need to learn to handle me.
I need to you to send me drugs via FedEx
And how about the fact that the first time i really truly looked at a guy's dick was in my car. MY CAR. GODDAMNIT!!!
I'm still thinking about that amazing orgasm last night. I literally heard angels singing "Hallelujah!!"
I knew she was the one when we had sex to the halo soundtrack.
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