How was last night?
She looked like Delta Burke in her fat Designing Women days ... and she just left like 2 minutes ago. Right after breakfast.
I don't wanna hook up with anyone from minnesota
everybody there reminds me of mashed potatoes... white and lumpy
my roommate and her friend got reaallllly high last night and it looks like they played scrabble. one of their words is "nippal"
...i had to draw her a diagram of her own vagina. including a little arrow to the clitoris. shouldn't it be the other way around?!?
Slept in my car last night. It snowed. I peed on the street. Hello 29...
I'm a sociology major remember
Well that and comm
Basically you majored in how to get laid
For sure shouldn't do homework after beers and joints. Just cited like 3 sentences at the end with (History, 2013)
Like sorry you chose to have an attractive girlfriend dude
I was thirsty after the sex and it was a long trek back to res so naturally I stole chocolate milk from his fridge as I left
It also means I'm watching porn with mario earphones so i can hear. Possibly the best way to mastrabate EVER
My mom just drunk texted me complaining about her genitals smelling like Taco Bell. I really am her son
You haven't lived until you've snorted coke from a Pharaoh's hand baby
Ahh yes. I lost my pants and swimming suit and phone charger. And I've found out who has them all even while hungover. Successful day. Nice party too.
It was pretty awesome. I drank out of a stein and attempted to dance to dubstep with some older guys in leiderhosen.
I just deff did the walk of shame.. His roommate/manager woke us up. A dog scared me on my stumble to the car.
This is why I'm single.
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