Weren't you self-described as an 'arab' slut?
No?
Well my cheeks are red now
I like to think it a success when the cops are called
I keep getting texted pictures of my husband with other men. I can't figure out if he wants a divorce or a threesome?
In the middle of getting a blow job, she looked up at me and said "this isn't the first time I've done this today"
I'm sure I'm not the FIRST newly single girl to table dance at a family restaurant.
I really need to find a new way to reward you other than head scratches, nutella and blowjobs.
screw it, I'll just be a stripper until next August when then are looking for suitable teachers to teach the future of America. it's like a feel good movie just a little out of order and im a dude.
Oh god I may vomit into the teacup of debauchery.
If I had a dollar for every time i woke up screaming for my pants i"d have enough money to buy all the beer I stole last night.
High moment. Almost just passed the blunt to the dog.
I'm gonna send you a dick pic now just so your uncomfortable at work
Why did I see a weird snapchat of you barking at McDonald's last night?
Your boobs stole my birthday thunder!
Get over here asap there are three naked girls two bottles of whiskey and only one of me
How do you ask the man who gives you multiple orgasms if he has friends who could do the same for your friend?
Randomize
