everything was going good until you started showing off the pictures of poop you took with your phone
she screamed"i told you already! counter clockwise spiral and the clockwise spiral!!" right in the middle of sex
wow, i never thought dating a choreographer would be so harsh
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
im actually trying to see how many sex dolls we need for our raft so we can stay buoyant while we attack kayakers
He screamed AMERICA, took a shot of vodka out of a Tupperware container, and then asked if he could see my tits
I think that means you're growing up...when your coke nail becomes your opening mail nail.
Also I like this area. Lots of places for me to get tacos.
There's no winning that game with me. It's either "Can I walk home at the end of the night," or "am I throwing up trying to sleep in the front yard." Rules are irrelevant.
I can't remember dinner
Hahaha "rub in the ketchup on your face, It'll just look like blush." some gay waiter said that to you, and you go "good idea!"
GOD DAMMIT TARYN WHY DO WE ALWAYS HAVE TO ROB PLACES IN OUR FUTURE PLANS?!
Stop watching porn on my work computer.
STOP WORKING ON MY PORN COMPUTER.
ok now I feel liek a very drunk human instead of a chaos being thanks water
i can do like, 15 pushups. 20 if i listen to dubstep.
Tbh you just need to fuck it out like I don't know another solution
the universe is starting to freak me out.. ive now had sex with 3 people who were born on the same day..
Randomize
