**** and his GF asked me to give his stuff back, and they would give me a 100. HA, they dont know I have it to charity haha
Forget about socially acceptable. Make me happy instead
and parents always said I was only motivated by money. Pfft they forgot vodka.
Does it count as a shower if I just sat in the tub singing I'm a Little Teapot?
I love that we get drink and call each other crying. It's kind of our thing.
i'm crying at olive garden. i've hit rock bottom
Please don't die.. At a gay bar... On a Wednesday. Obituaries are not allowed to be that entertaining.
The heaters out again. Makin a fire in thebroke toilet for warmth.
I wish! That ended in 2001 when we all got collectively band from the Settle Inn. As a group we are also band from social events at the zoo. It's impressive really.
Whiskey and I have a long and stories tradition of excellence
Apparently we stole a dog last night. I woke up and it was just staring at me. But we fed it left over KFC for breakfast so it's cool.
I mean I want to go somewhere. I just don't want to put on pants or behave.
I'll pay you back with progressively deviant sexual favors.
It's become almost a Pavlovian response. The sound of the vacuum being run by hubby causes an instantaneous involuntary orgasm.
also, my mom just called to make sure the dick tattoo on your arm was fake..
Randomize
