in my opinion joe jonas is kinda pointless. hes just the pretty boy front runner.
just because you dressed up as a brontosaurus doesn't mean you can poop in my yard and roar at my neighbors
Um, yeah. You lit my birthday candles with a joint. Mom= not happy.
Nothing like a $37 iTunes bill. Jesus Christ do you know how many $2 beer/shot specials that is??? The answer is 16. 16 beer/shot specials.
He asked if I wanted to "hang out"
A verb which here means "do lines off my dick"
its sad im about to start saving up for how drunk i need to be for the holidays
My fridge broke, and apparently the back is missing. The repair guy just fixed it with a pizza box. I didn't ask where the box came from, but it wasn't mine. Reason #20 why rent is cheap.
you were crying saying "if you love me you will find me a loaf of bread"
I just shit my pants and had a heart attack. Simultaneously. May or may not be related to this game.
Ill go to bed but tamed sharks isnt so much of a bad idea. Not for riding
Drunk and bowling. Only good things can come of this
He showed up soaking wet with a flashlight and a ping pong ball. I couldn't say no
Well we've always known you have a weakness for guys with balls in their hands
snapping my married booty call and next thing I know a plan b ad pops up
I am just High Enough to train A-Team of bodybuilding squirrels MMA techniques to tear you asunder. And it's not that I want to is just don't you make me do it!
And ANOTHER guy that I once got naked is doing gay porn now. Wtf? Am I the audition?!
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