dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
I stuck it in and pulled it out
Did she like it?
She giggled?
She liked it
You know I'm really starting to enjoy being everyones first gay experience
Dude I thought this was going to suck, but moving back in with my dad is like being at a frat party every night only everyone is 40 years old.
Pass out mid-funnel last night.
Valium party in the driveway. Attendance: 1. Don't make me do this alone.
Do you think she hates me because I thought her roommate's name actually was Butterface?
Random girl at this party just gave me a lap dance in a la-Z-boy. Night significantly improved.
We were fucking while the tv was on, and one of those animal cruelty commercials came on. We then switched over and started doing it doggy style. It was then that I realized that I'm going to hell.
DID YOU REALLY JUST GIVE ME A FIRST BASE SIGN
I stopped him mid keg stand to show him how cute my bra was...
And what in gods fuck were you drinking. It tasted like windex with a mixture of juce
I am serious when I say I think I broke a rib having sex with Kyle. It might be puncturing my lung. No lie. I might die today.
I know what I want to do this Friday. However, it might end in me getting kicked out of an arcade and a mini golf course.
Okay but look at his jawline. I NEED TO RIDE IT.
Randomize
