I definitely ripped a mole off of her back in the process
Same, I didn't even get to be tarzan this summer
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
I've been meaning to ask you. The first night in the city did we do key bumps with a suicidal homeless man? My memory is fuzzy
He seriously just asked the doctor if taking the medicine for chlamydia was going to cut into his drinking time. Never let it be said that he is not dedicated.
Apparently, Mom was less-than-happy about us shotgunning beers before we opened presents.
He woke me up for a 10am bootycall. he was already drunk when he got here and when we were fucking, bagpipes started playing amazing grace outside of my window!! I love Boston on st. Patties day!!
The maintenance guy asked for a box to stand on to reach the ceiling. All I could offer him was a keg.
Your message cut off at "shit on the floor". Your life is incredible.
Duuuuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fruuuuuuuuck. and by that i mean fuuuck
I should have listened to my dad and mean girls... If you have sex you'll get pregnant and die.
No it's like. I don't respect you. And I think you're a terrible person but. I still wanna bone it out.
is that a dick in a sweater?
I just ordered a onesie on amazon in the back of the ambulance while my patient was sleeping. I'm an adult
Relax
It's hard to relax when a woman is waxing your asshole.
Randomize
