There's a technique?! I just slide my tongue around
apparently i was offering everyone ambien and shouting, it's only like heath ledger if you want it to be!
its like they have never seen someone walk through campus with a plunger
We met at my place after separate parties but the condom wrapper was red with hearts and said love. Does that count as a romantic date?
I think one day, after evolution kicks in, my sons will thank me for having a 3rd ball. That's how much sex I'm having.
I have to cancel. My sons dad is out of jail unexpectedly and i'm kinda an emotional wreck. P.s. This is not the life I dreamed of as a little girl.
Let's get one thing straight; we aren't in a relationship. We fuck and occasionally go to subway.
It's that thing where you don't have any food so you just drink beer to get your needed calories for the day.
Happy 420. I woke up to a girl smoking weed and dragging me out of bed. Chemistry makes so much sense high.
During sex his mom asks from the other side of the door, "Do you like avocados?" Who doesn't like avocados?
I just explained my sex life to the "if you give a moose a muffin" book... Is that weird?
Oh great. I guess I'm second on that list now that we've confirmed she's not a lesbian AND that was her sister.
Vodka, rum, moonshine, I don't care, just bring like 5gallons.
Uhm I have a bottle of tequila, a gallon of orange juice, and leggings. Now ask me again how hard im going? And that doesn't cover tomorrow.
we finally found him at 2 am. he was 3 miles from the house and tried running into the lake when he saw us pull up. i don't think he'll be taking ecstacy again any time soon.
Randomize
