Why can't we have signs that automatically flash on our foreheads that say not interested when gross ugly guys come around, like those glasses that get dark when the sun comes out?
this is amzing! feels like my body is having sex with its surroundings!
i kept telling her phones are not food, and she countinued to put it in her mouth..
Yeah, she tried to drown her but then they hooked up.
This from the guy I found eating salad out of a pot lid in his boxers on his porch last night.
I though us hooking up in the field was your way of saying you were an outdoors person
Okay I take that back some girl just said pussy sweat. Get me outta here
Know your penis has been the topic of conversation over glasses of wine.
Brett got me a cake with a pic of me shitting
I have the liquor shits and this time, it's personal.
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
Do you have feelings for this penis?
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Bro, it was an EPIC night once again last night. I’m so sorry that you saw me naked.
Randomize
