guy picked up a cops taser, thing shot him in the neck, he went down and pissed himself, cop started laughing and hasnt called an ambulance.
she was definitely a virgin. no ones that bad unless theyre a virgin
your sister was..
This situation is one cop call away from being a Lifetime movie.
letting you know, as a good neighbor, that when your windows open and your shade is up we can hear and see you dancing naked to money maker... nice boobs
I think I ruined Robin and Mikes anniversary. I walked in on them fucking, accidentally broke the necklace he gave her, and I stole the keg from their party. Not in that order
You better drive. If I decide to let them talk me into a 3-way, I don't want you to be stranded.
While I faked being asleep, he literally prayed to God out loud, asking for forgiveness for losing his virginity before marriage.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Shes 18 and still has a curfew. it was great. didnt have to worry about her still being here in the morning.
Seriously, I'm making a calendar and marking off the days with little penis's
Less than a month to go... I do not understand how I was able to put up with a roommate who wears bright green Crocs for a year.
I put ketchup in a girls hair last night. I need a sorry balloon
My mom and sister were over. When my drunk roommate came home, he yelled "GOT BITCHES IN MY CONDO"
Need ride home. Girls. Stolen keg. Rolling down streets. Horny girls. No condoms. Rescue needed. girls and beer in exchange for rescue and bacon?
I. Hate. You. Where are you, are said girls cute, and how did you know I bought bacon? And how does this always happen to you?
Smarter than the average bear
He just canceled. I got an amazing new dress and now he’s decided he’s spending the weekend with his family
In other news, there’s some rando in an expensive hotel bar who is going to get very lucky tonight because I love the way this dress makes my tits look. Want to help me find him?
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