You supply the liquor and I'll "accidently" forget my bathing suit.
Deal!
bitch got booty called while we were making out. and then she actually left.
He passed out. Woke up long enough to declare himself "the sauce boss" and then bit me in the face.
Drunk on Tuesday. Double fisting. Mmmbop is playing. Only girl in the group. Life is complete.
all i know is that i listed him in my phone as 'vagina cookies.' that can only be a good thing.
sorry can't make it tonight, greg's getting back from italy. he's had two weeks of carbs and no gym; now's my chance to get myself a piece of that newly-fat, low self-esteemed ass.
Heaven was on the 3rd floor and Hell was on the first. When the cop walked up he was confused as to who the noise complaint was for and wrote both apartments a noise violation.
I managed to make myself a bowl of apple jacks, took one bite and had to stop eating them because they were making my brain wiggle. How was your comedown?
Well, you know sobriety isn't something I like to do on the reg.
Lets start a coed nudist frat/sorority. It would be amazing. Or just an orgy club. It would also be amazing
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
i need to un-sleep with a few of those brothers before we ever go back to that house again. i'm serious. i will not be a fraternity groupie.
he just sent me a dick pic, it highly resembled a cheese stick
that game of battleshots got way too fucking intense. why does the couch have burn marks now.
She actually made an event on facebook for tomorrow when she does a pregnancy test, 8 people are attenting so far
Randomize
