Where are you?
In a non slutty way
just once id like to meet someone on craigslist who isnt fat
whoever created level 16 on brickbreaker is a dick
I hid a girl's boot last night so I could ransom it back this morning via the "blowjobs for boots" program.
I mean, I know going to rehab probably didn't make her a lesbian, but I can always hope
This is the moment in my life where I take a fork in the "nice guy" road ive traveled for 23 years and fuck everything in sight that doesnt have herpes, or is in-between flare ups and I don't know about it until my dick is on fire.
I'm unsure as to how you were able to snapchat me with your hands duck taped to beer, but I appreciated it nonetheless.
You burned the hair off your arms. Again.
It grows back stronger each time.
How bad would it be if I asked him for my "ho ho ho" thong back? They're my fav christmas pair!
Do one night stands count towards my number?
Yes. A penis is a penis
Even bad ones?
YES.
I was intimate with him for twenty minutes and will be intimate with shame for twenty years.
It's a sexual break up. We maintain a friendship and leave any and all sexual attraction out. It's not hard, having a baby is harder than that.
Oh shit that's not good dude. I'd head straight for Williamsport hospital the first ingredient in that shit is lithium batteries. You don't want to know what the second one is
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
Sitting across the table from one of my high school teachers who hasn't seen me since I was about 16 drinking a beer wearing a leotard
Randomize
