due to concerns over safety, the theme of the 'naked fondue party' has now been changed to the 'naked fondue party with optional apron' please b.y.o.apron. extra prizes for most creative apron.
She made me cum so hard I couldn't hear for half an hour after
Birthday was great, I got entirely too drunk and made really poor life decisions. It was everything a birthday should be.
You need to tell your booty call to take some sudafed or something. I swear I thought you were humping Kermit the frog last night
This is the most scared i've been of my hands since i did shrooms.
I feel like it'll be a success as long as she doesn't end up dead in a ditch. There has to be a line somewhere.
I'm sorry but I have WAY too many sex/ hookup related bruises on visible areas to be going home tmrw
I'd cum for enchiladas.
She tackled him mid-puke while the other two were cutting up a $60 dildo with a kitchen knife and putting the pieces in a Corona bottle.
He tried to stop traffic by waving his half eaten pizza at cars.... And we were stupid enough to cross .....??!!!
I probably should have eaten more before I started shotgunning beers at 9am, but it was so much damn fun.
I was going to say that I wasn't sure how that happened... but then I remembered that I bonded with the Australians over vitamins and INXS and they bought me tequila.
I can't believe we broke the fucking lamp.
*i* can't believe believe we broke the lamp fucking.
I made him fuck me while wearing a Thor helmat from Walmart. Geek sex is the best sex
Naptime over. I've got fresh contacts and tequila. RAAAAAAGE!
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