I have no idea what her name is. I only remember putting my dick between her ass cheeks.
woke up in nothing but a glued-on tiger tail. they used super glue.
I realized i make the same noise when i get a blow job as when i eat pizza
Just saw a motorized bathtub. I think this college thing is gonna work out.
We had sex in front of Notre Dame Cathedral, but I lost my wallet. God giveth and God taketh away.
She looked at it and said "your dick is like the golden gate bridge."
What if this is the rest of my life? Sitting at the bar waiting for someone to play Single Ladies
Is it possible to just pretend that everything we did after grilling up your goldfish didn't happen?
I'm not about to serve this country to fuckin not have rum and cheezits for breakfast
On the plus side, I got cel phone video of a major fox news host doing coke.
Texas awaits me. And all the cocks that live there too.
My backyard is filled with beer cans. You idiots turned our backyard into a redneck ball-pit
Can I use your baby to go shoplifting?
He said he wanted to sit next to the fountain so he could "watch the water hit the other water".
Vasectomy results are in. No swimmers in the water. REPEAT. No swimmers in the water. Come help me harness my new found super-power
Randomize
