It's like I'm the Little Bo Peep of sheparding dicks.
Only someone with your twisted mind could come up with that simile. Do you sit around and read 'How to turn Beloved Childrens Stories into Sexual Analogies?' This is the 3rd time you've done this.
I hate having morals and standards the next morning.
i just found a bag of weed behind my capital one card. i guess that's what's in my wallet.
Ran into him today. He apologized via facebook. sometimes I hate our generation
who do I fuck, the girl waiting for me upstairs or her roomate making me mac and cheese right now?? This is the single hardest decision I've always wanted to have to make
Just whacked off in the middle of writing a paper, gave me great ideas. Note, should do this more often.
We're not too concerned with getting her out of jail. We're on a mission for donuts.
I don't think going to Relay for Life and painting our faces while everyone stares at us is a sufficent late night after the bars.
I shouldn't trust a guy I just met with the pull out method. That's a big responsibility.
I have bruises everywhere. I think I took "the drinks are strong" as more of a challenge than a warning.
just for future reference, lake water is NOT mix for hard stuff. nor is it an adequate substitute.
I'm going to have to include Angry Orchard in my thesis acknowledgements
My idiot ex texted me on Valentine's day to tell me I was right, he did need a therapist.
I hate when I wake up and find my vibrator next to me. Such a waste of an orgasm...getting myself off in my sleep and not remembering
rock bottom is drinking straight vodka from a protein shaker, singing one direction and crying alone in your room. exams.
Randomize