I find it funny that "sexual harassment" contains the phrase "ass sex". Let me know what your thoughts are on the matter.
You threw up. And every time you flushed you would wave and go "Bye Bye!" and then when the new water came you would greet it with "Helloooo!"
she just refered to her hymen as "the mrs"
All I remember is doing a naked tuck and roll of your bed.
using blue streamers we found on the bathroom floor was probably not the best substitute for toilet paper.
It probably isn't a good idea to go home with last night's hookup's brother. And sister.
Probably is probably an understatement.
You put Smirnoff in your grape juice and called it communion...
You know how I got mad at him for making out with his formal date? Apparently I fucked mine. I'm guessing any exclusivity is out of the question.
Nothing bad can happen when you have a kiwi flavored condom. Absolutely nothing.
Sex-sore abs and my workout pants have gravel stains on the knees. It's like the workout of shame.
We're you guys there last night when everyone started chanting "Nacho Steph"? Someone picked me up, carried me to the nacho cheese and made me do a nacho cheese stand.
all i know is there's a picture on my phone of him wearing my purple sweatpants and licking the bottom of my foot.
Well I can cross 'get my dick slathered in coconut oil while watching the bob's burgers porn parody' off my bucket list.
You reached new levels of laziness. After we woke you up to take shots with us, you stayed in bed so you didn't have to move when you were drunk and sleepy
This is the Front Desk Lady from the Saturolite Inn. Your friend is passed out in the lobby. Please come help her.
Randomize
