don't tell her this, but while we were doing it doggy style I picked up my phone and changed my status to "who let the dogs out"
the higher we get, the more he looks like ray charles.
apparently you can't crawl through the drive-thru window
He poured the shots. We did them together. I cheersd him out of the shower
Company party. Just told vp "you look like a cat person"
There is a hole in her door about 2 inch in diameter. You may see me on YouPorn
As I was sneaking out of his house last night his moms lover was sneaking in, he held the door for me...
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
I still can't believe that I ate McDonald's off of my chest in his bed...
Cross faded me is not the classiest.
No not at all haha I wish there was a picture of that
My dog got laid yesterday. Some lady came over with her husky to breed. He did it like a champ. I was so proud
Btw, if I didn't have 3 limbs in restraints and my free hand offing myself with the pocket rocket, I would have snap chatted you. Next time.
Someone explain why I'm twerking in my bathroom right now before a charity run
Yeah I passed out. The last thing I remember is the lady telling me I couldn't play the clarinet with my nose.
I may or may not be drinking in a church parking lot.
Please tell me you haven’t left campus yet!!!! I forgot my Hitachi and will not survive Thanksgiving without a steady supply of orgasms
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