i am watching brooke knows best right now and hulk is totally dating his daughter's look a like. it is gross and disturbing.
the most pressuring question is, why are you watching brooke knows best?.
When he took off his pants i accidently shouted "that is one small wiener," and thats when he left
you'd think someone with a dick that small would take what he could get
You taught me that having a dip while u shit is awesome. I appreciate u for that
Just witnessed a circumcision at clinical. i suddenly feel a sense of reconciliation over every guy who's done me dirty...
I feel eeeverything like there's a rhythm and everything can be felt w/o ever touching it. And it's beautiful. Sunshine or raindrops it's like orgasming. Everything has a taste.
She just pored wine down the turkeys hole and said that she christened it like the whore that it is...happy thanksgiving.
I felt like a personal hot pocket and all I could taste was cigarettes.
I hope so much that you got average or above average dick tonight because I wish you the best
My morning started with my mom giving me the number for a substance abuse councellor. How's your day going?
I'm storing dick pics, so basically if I'm still single after residency...ur gonna get bombarded. It's gonna be a blizzard of dicks.
Feel free to keep your blizzard of dicks to yourself.
I think drunk me is trying to kill me.
Was reaching for my vibrator this morning out of my nightstand and strained my neck muscle. I'm getting so old.
My ex-wife, who I haven't heard from since the divorce, just Amazoned me cherry flavored massage oil and a rainbow caps with the message "Happy Pride". What's the polite response?
For the record, if you sneeze while you have a dildo in your vagina and you dont have a good grip on it, that thing can get some distance.
Put the lady boner away. He's engaged. To my brother. No, life is not fair.
Randomize
