I swear, if I find out you're lying, I'm going to put your name on one of those herpes watch websites and put the link up on every social networking site in existence.
We're going to play a drinking game. It's called "Senior Year of College."
Lesbians. Lesbians everywhere.
I apparently spent $173 at the bar last night. The proof is in the vomit on my pillow and the receipt I tried to clean it up with.
Dude, i don't know. I don't remember anything after we started chanting/playing "shot of gin."
He said and I quote "Had to beat one off in the Burger King bathroom before I went over." Thats somebody that takes pride in his work.
I just want to have normal problems like what kind of puppy to get, or should I pay a hooker to fuck Scott, or even a dilemma about fucking Twizzlers. I don't know.
Classic dick move. Breaking up your buddies 3-some by coming into his room and doing the Harlem Shake.
I was less embarrassed asking him to torrent the teen mom's porn. I'm not gonna ask him to about season 4 of PLL.
I woke up and there was pizza slices on the fucking walls of my room
He has a burner phone just to send dick pics. It's revolutionary
I'm 4,715,723% sure I don't give a fuck.
I'm determining which apartments I'm mostly to move into based on how suitable the kitchens are for sex .
Someone wrote "LazerSwords" on my cock last night. My erect cock. Tequila is no one's friend.
My ex gave me head because she said she didn't enough when we were dating... Best ex ever? I think yes.
Randomize
