so howd the 'mom i only play with condoms' conversation go?
I have a feeling this won't be the last time I wake up wrapped in a shower curtain with the words "Blame Bono" spray painted on it
Ok wear gym clothes just in case we feel like going shitfaced to the gym
She was moaning so loud as i walked out of the room her roommates gave me a standing ovation... i think they are next
I'm scared to see what happens if we keep winning like this. I don't think there enough livers for every one after the season is over.
I feel like we should build an island for girls that have committed atrocious numbers of unforgivable sins. We'll call it 'whore island' after the anchorman fashion.
I woke up at 4 am to a guy curled up in the fetal position sobbing in our front yard. Oh college.
Dude. He almost took three different girls home, all while dressed up as Amy Winehouse. If he goes as Kurt Cobain next weekend, we're screwed.
I feel like I don't show you my boobs enough. And you deserve to see them like all the time
Nothing says you made great Saturday night choices like someone's dick that you don't remember, poking you in the ass Sunday morning.
Well just saw that professor I hooked up with on campus and I look like a dumpster baby
hey u leave my anime porn out of this
My good Christian morals say no, but my complete disregard of anything related to religion says yes
There’s a special place in hell for tall guys with small dicks
Dude, exfoliate your balls. you'll thank me later.
Randomize
