That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
Seeing him suck some chick's face on VH1 wasn't exactly how I imagined the "we should see other people" conversation going.
My professor just gave everyone in the class extra credit... except for the kid wearing the Cubs hat
I can't get away from Pickles they're either stuck in me, in my mouth, or I'm stuck in one. fuck my whole entire life.
Congratulations, you fucked a nickle into me.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Did you leave a blizzard on my porch last night? Or was that someone else giving out a metaphorical threat to me?
I wish they'd wear their tampons on the outside. At least gimme some warning
I couldn't find the bathroom last night...so I wrapped myself in the curtains and stuck my butt out the window and peed from two stories up. Thank god I don't remember.
No cash. I had to buy four bowls of soup to meet the credit card limit. I'm not even upset. SO MUCH SOUP.
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
You would only karaoke to Spanish songs, but sang with the accent of the french candle stick in beauty and the beast.
He flew in from NY last night. We had sex in the back of my car in the airport parking lot and then he fed me fresh Babka (from Breads Bakery) as I drove him home. I can't decide if I love him or Babka more.
She got up, grabbed me a box of gushers told me to start eating, and immediately gave me the best head I've ever gotten.
wait i saw you last night?
we found you ass naked on the couch covered in pillows.
Randomize
