idk, it's all black and i hear low talking...
dude, i think you're in initiation!
shit. that's not good.
don't you miss freshman year when you could get away with "but i've never given a bj before..."
My gym is having a pizza and beer party. God im starting to love this place.
It's confirmed I did eat a ping pong ball last night...
My mom is purposely blasting Shania Twain downstairs so I can't jack off.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
Do you think if I puke at the gym they think is because I'm going hard walking on the treadmill?
The usual. Woke up on a dog bed with peeps and $11.
I consider it a good night. I met Jimmy Buffet, who grabbed my ass, and I body-checked a toddler. She had it coming.
Found our threesome girl. She says I'm pretty. She doesn't know I'm pregnant. Yet. Think we can pull it off?
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Ew. After that you just pretty much proved that your vagina is the reason why my vagina needs two toilet seat covers when peeing in public restrooms
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
I just want someone to shove bread from panera down my throat
I just put on my phone calendar to remind me of my final child support payment in 2029
Randomize
