I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I think my guts just had a chinese fire drill
hey can i ask you a kinda weird question?
i know what the question is. yes they are bigger, and no i did not get plastic surgery
She wouldn't go home with me cause I forgot her name. I didn't realize it would matter after she danced with her vagina on my face
just had cupcakes and mountain dew for dinner-now i'm playing super mario brothers. 10 year olds all over the world would kill to be me.
They were fighting, but then they bumped into the bong and it shattered. After that they just hugged and cried.
when you tell me you got me a birthday present, I have to assume it will show up in a drug test.
If I don't have carpet burn in the morning you aren't trying hard enough.
Have you SEEN his girlfriend?? Or talked to her? Christ almighty I'd drink every day just to die let alone black out
I love you, but it's "shark week" I'll make it up to you with naked breakfast.
After 7 months of nothing.. shall we throw your vagina a party? as its reinstatement into society?
It was Thanksgiving sex. I was thankful for it. Need I say more?
I woke up with Pop Rocks stuck to my ass
My goal is to be drunk before we even get out of the No Wake Zone.
I just want somewhere where I can sit down, without changing my clothes, that will serve me breakfast food and booze. Is that too much to ask?
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