Can i come over
After you called me a desperate slut? No
Come over
Maybe i should go to church more so i can meet girls like in that song, you know, the ones that act slutty on every day but sunday...
ah, so the catholic church. i gotcha
No - a douche bag is not a fashion accessory. They do not make Gucci Douchebags
I watched the entire movie Forgetting Sarah Marshall before I realized it was in Spanish.
I don't remember her missing an ear while we were at the bar
It was huge And he was twirling it around. Im telling you, beautiful wonderpenis
Even my vagina gasped.
thank you for letting me use your house as a brothel.
you pulled down your pants to convince a girl you were god
Bring fortys. we have the duct tape. its onnn mothafuckaaaa
You can jump from the roof to the pool. Trust me. I have done this before.
That's not a current picture, because if you look deep enough into my eyes you can still see morals. Not these days.
That time we were having sex when you were super drunk, I kept yelling out, "Oh God," and you said, "You're going to need him after this." Idk why I suddenly thought of that.
I'll do anything with you, except downhill sports and butt stuff.
Left my wallet at the store. Wouldn't have noticed if the joint I just rolled wasn't in it.
Randomize
