You are an awful beat friend I am goin to die in a car accident and then my corpse is going to be used by criminals ala weekend at bernies to rob a bank then my corpse will go to jail Thanks john Thanks for nuthin
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
we're going to dress like we're asking for it, because we are
Why does he only make me orgasm when I'm about to break up with him?
Guy in our group took down a chick in a wheelchair last night.
The only bad thing about this relationship... my forearm strength is dwindling
She tried catching cigarette ashes on her tongue like snowflakes.
Dont act like I'm the only one that gets on a plane and picks out the one im gonna have fuck if we have time before the crash
I realized I was totally the dude in that hook up. I came first and didn't wanna help him finish. And he had paisley sheets.
Listen it's no longer the walk of shame to class when ur leaving the frat house and the brothers ask "when are coming back home"
Watching a guy masturbate in real time is a lot less theatrical than porn had me to believe.
The date went significantly better after the fifth shot of fireball.
Single lady's Saturday night: eat doritos, masturbate, eat more doritos. Do shot of Jager. Repeat until desired result is achieved.
i just want things to go smoothly
oh they won't lmao
Lol, maybe a little bit. I don't know. I don't keep a super keen memory log of dicks honestly.
Randomize
