he saw my "i like bacon" magnet on the fridge and i told him how much i love meat, then we started making out
what a beautiful fairy tale
so was this before or after i puked down the ice luge?
I used a physics textbook to prop her up so she wouldn't choke on her vomit...see I have learned something from statics class.
Just watched a UNI fan at the bar lick the tears off of a KU fans face.. See what march madness does to people
No subtext here. People are naked.
Dude, he sent me a pic of his dick. I thought dating a married man wouldn't remind me so much of high school. Seriously.
And then he used the flashlight app to illuminate me giving him head. Thanks IPhone
We used the solo cup bag for her hair tie. Desperate times call for desperate measures.
I would rather get explosive diarrhea at the aquarium than go home alone tonight
I dipped out before he woke up, but I made sure to take the pizza with me.
She moved all of her stuff out while we were gone. Shit in the toilet, and didn’t flush. So yeah it went well.
Jus had a dream that I borrowed bob dylans car to save us from a pack of raptors. Pretty stoked about it.
Humming the Indiana Jones theme song as my hand makes its way to his dick.
I woke up upside down with my head in your ottoman and like a foot of space between the ottoman and chair.. My legs were straight up in the air... Yes. Your mother found me.
Have u seen my vagina and my gorilla costume? Im in need of it.
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