Yeah but my nose is so stuffed if I tried to give him head I'd suffocate
Do you think there's anyone left in this world that hasn't masturbated in a computer chair?
I'm not working tomorrow. need to take advantage of the last opportunity for weeks of morning sex.
Nhdgh I love you very much hello becausevs. Vagina pensiono
no today was horrible, i woke up and somebody slit my car tire and left an apology letter in my wiper that said "sorry wrong house"
Dude. My sister is off limits. Touch her again and I'll rip off your dick and force feed it to you.
I accept this challenge.
We have sex, then we talk about foreign policy. Its a win-win.
There needs to be a crayon color for how blue my balls are
I just karate chopped a humming bird out of mid air. It came at my face while I was out side smoking. Scared the shit out of me. My ninja skills just took over. Haha. I mean really at that point it was me or him.
Sex in the corn maze.....not as good as advertised.
I'm sitting outside your room listening for sex noises eating pepperoni...slowly
So apparently nutella and chocolate body paint aren't actually the same thing.
Oddly enough, the sex change dream i had made me miss you more.
she hacked my macbook and downloaded an illegal version of the original pokemon red, completely nude in my computer chair. there were several levels of hornyness existing all at once
This girl was in the river screaming that someone didn't love her anymore...that's when the guy in a kilt claimed her...
Randomize
