no more hot dogs for you........
fine no more vajj for you
Saved 180 Bucks tonight. Pulled my own tooth. More money to party with.
i just saw a white kid with an afro using a martini shaker as a coffee thermos. go college.
So there's dick imprints in the peanut butter
Apparently she got a minor consumption for using vodka soak tapmons
Does that work!! Please say yes
onest when I told you I'm a paramedic but I'm also a stripper.
There's strippers and bear every where so ether you gave me the wrong address or this is the coolest birthday party thrown for a seven year old ever.
It was awful. Their identical twins so it was like having sex with Jeff wearing a wig and shaved legs.
You know, part of me wants to die and the other part of me doesn't want to live
everything in the house taste like gin even the water, friday nite was a success
i feel like spreading the word of drunken joy.
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
Dude my toilet did not deserve what I just did to it
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Neighbor is sitting on his porch looking like he made some terrible life decisions and I just want to be like "I drank half of a handle of peach vodka in a shed last night. I understand" but I think they're swingers so his night probs sucked more.
Randomize
