i just realized how high i was when i was screaming red light challenge at the top of my lungs and am watching it alone
I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
i feel like when youre not in my profile picture no one knows who i am.
I just found a 1/2 inch of mimosa in my shoe.
You should get more absorbent shoes.
i realized i had a pad on before i went to this guys house so i stuck it in his neighbors shrub.
I keep finding coffee grounds in my vagina
Man the liquor store just wrong numbered me, its a sign even god wants me to drink
she was stripping to whiskey lullaby. most depressed boner.
Is it wrong i wouldn't sleep with him because his boxers said #1 dad all over them?
I'll give you some choices for what to get me for Christmas. 1.You naked. 2.You naked 3.You naked.
So I'm texting her. How do I steer the conversation toward "I honestly would be fine never seeing you again"?
He wants to make me arch my back "like I'm having an exorcism". Not sure if I'm turned on or freaked out.
I was actually kind of excited. I mean, how many people can say they've been question by the CIA?
He forgot how to sit. we had to pick him up and set him down.
So far 2 of my professors caught me looking at their dicks
Randomize
