Nipple clamps can be ambiguous
took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
i have received so many congratulations texts this morning. sleeping with him really was a good decision.
Don't forget your talking to the guy who got arrested for throwing beads back at the Mardi Gras floats. You can't deny that's a first, and neither could that cop.
Let's just say, at one point i got woken up at 4am by a naked guy who was offering me steak, in a cup.
They wouldn't let me go to sleep at the police station while I was waiting to bail u out. YOU OWE ME
We should celebrate the resignation of Berlusconi tonight with too many bottles of wine and sambuca. We're allies, right?
I just had a dream that I was pulling you around downtown on a sled, from bar to bar. Dear lord if we start that there's no hope for us
We just had a sexually tense moment where we both chose the trough the pee. I love gay clubs.
omg I just had an epiphany about why I grew into such a whore....
HAVE YOU EVER NOTICED WHAT THE SPICE GIRLS USED TO WEAR?!? those were my idols, I never stood a chance
You just sent me a picture of a federal crime. Like. You don't give a fuck.
I just had a sexting conversation using medieval jargon. I think he is a fine suitor.
Blizzard, Hour 9: I'm 7 beers deep and have finished Ninja Turtles. I am listening to the NYPD and Nassau Fire Dept pipes and drums and writing new drum scores in my head, which I may or may not remember tomorrow
Yeah apparently i called the bartender a "fucking prison warden" after she took my keys and called me a cab
Omg, new summer goal: sex in a bouncy castle.
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