What do you think she thinks of us?
I think she thinks we're whores... but ya I think she likes us
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I hid my booze in my old Sesame Street lunch box. Big Bird might be disappointed, but I feel Oscar the Grouch would approve.
at what point did you think saran wrap was a better alternative to shoes?
Im not coming back to that place until im drunk. If I walk in there sober Ill start screaming uncontrollably. Not words, just sounds.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
And then after we fucked he wouldn't stop calling me "champ". It was like I had sex with an extremely attractive soccer coach
I just used a VHS tape as a plate for sanwich
As soon as he came we went to Dairy Queen. That drive through lady was very condescending about our "just fucked" ice cream.
I should rephrase... I'm trying to not sit on other peoples faces besides my boyfriends.
Uh do you have my pants because I have yours
Heat not working dressed like an eskimo. A real one with a ski sock on my junk
This kid wants me to stop partying. Like I have only known you for 5 days. Chill.
The stripper was super into me until she pulled out my tits then I realized.... This bitch is just using my ass to get MORE TIPS
He had a tattoo of the Batman logo around his asshole. I noped right the hell out of there.
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