did you know that the clit is basically just a tiny penis? Ya.. So just think about that next time you're down there.
Soo i just shotgunned a water balloon...
You know, it's scary to think that someday I might buy a pregnancy test with pride, not at 2am...
I have been running off of weed, alcohol, and Mexican food. What is Tallahassee.
the best thing about long term relationship is that the fact that i bothered to shave my legs today counts as a valentines gift
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
It's nights like those I refer to my life motto: You can't be just friends with someone after you've seen their genitals.
Woke up with your brother in my bed...where do you want me to return him?
Are you up yet? I really want to know if i tried sleeping in a field... i have the vaguest memory of trying to
It took years to build this empire of casual fuckings and not carings.
I think that all guys are assholes, some of them just have less assholeish qualities that we accept in our lives and that we can look past enough to deal. They have to be a pretty special asshole.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
Dude, you fell into a tree, and both of the tables, AND the window well... Resilient aren't you?
We ended the night eating peanutbutter with our hands and smoking cigarettes in the house at 4am. Fucking Everclear, man.
Took the ex out to the bar, then left with her and her best friend....and you said this was a bad thing.
Randomize
