She might as well just lie down with one of those red "Easy Buttons" next to her
i'm dressed up like the coppertone baby and being hit on a guy in a monk costume. the irony is not lost on me.
All I want for christmas is my sobriety back.
all she kept saying was "harder" "mayo" and "who are you"
Just did free shots of tequila at a walmart. Hello Mexico
I am fine. Katie thinkr i broke things pole dancing. I am coherant.
She crushed my hand with the box spring last time, so it's all good.
You turned byob into bring your own shit show. Good work.
But hes like a baby bird with a broken wing that i want to FUCK.
Fuck I am so excited for the first time I can make someone call me Doctor Nikki during sex after I finish my PhD
All I remember is sitting on your kitchen floor and playing with a banana like it was a viking ship.
His buddy came running in the room after we had sex, and started "sponging" the sweat off my forehead with his sport wristband.
Doing shots with my high school valedictorian. Bucket list
Greattt I just sexted my dad trying to write u back
I saw some guy masturbating in the Burger King parking lot and I’m just fucking done
Randomize
