Is it possible to be promiscuous but in a classy way?
even through the webcam i could tell he was aiming for my face/hair
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
yup. cregs moms pubic hair is still glued to the celing
well as my mentor always said, "Don't antagonize the man whose penis gives you multiple orgasms."
I sorta feel bad for the actual person in my fake id that got a drunk in public charge.
Today is definitely a "stand over the toilet and pee through the opening at the bottom of my boxers" kind of day.
I guess the silver lining is that having a big dick really comes in handy when you're hungover.
It's a mixed blessing.
You were running around waving the flier in everyone's face and thats how we ended up in a church eating free breakfast tacos at 3 am
I know it's like I wanna bring somebody fun who I haven't drunkenly expressed my feelings for. Or hooked up with. It's a struggle.
He sent me nudes and I told him he reminded me of Buffalo Bill.
Then he kissed my hand sensually and said "you're a Black Queen. Don't let anyone tell you different."
She moaned the name on my fake id during sex, that or she's cheating on me with someone named Victor
Just paid my weed guy with a check. I've got this whole adult thing down.
Hey, don't blame me for the shitty evening; I wasn't the one who promised hookers, Dos Equis and foster kittens. Keith was.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
Randomize