it was a shit show
We all have our days. But yours might be on the internet.
come over
yeah sure
wait who is this again? my contacts got deleted...but tell me and ill be there in 10
told my boyfriend i was a virgin so he wouldnt feel bad since he is. now hes asking why his dick is so itchy. should i tell him why?
i don't see why you should, it's not like you told the other guys with the itchy dicks.
It's safe to say that our attempt at trying to fuck in the grand Sierra elevator was a bad idea.
Hey, you guys have all had chicken pox, right?
Too lazy to get out of my bed thats 2 feet away from you. Are you sure youre alright?
she's five days sober.....are those consecutive????
5 days not 5 nights... like a bad hotel/vacation deal
Want to know what makes for a better story than treehouse sex? Getting busted during treehouse sex
I guess I've just seen a lot of penises since then
You don't want to cheat on your husband, you just want to fuck someone who isn't him.
50% drunk capacity currently
Also the bouncer Straight up told me my id was shitty and I should get a new one. But he let me in anyways because #boobz
Fuck you asshole. You cost me cheerleader pussy.
Just saw our highschool guidance counselor at the bar and he's taken six shots in the last hour. Those teenagers have fucking hardened him.
HE'S LIKE A GREEK GOD BUT HE'S FROM BOSTON. HE'S A BOSTON GOD
pray to him
I WANNA PRAY ON HIS DICK
Randomize
