Could you imagine if a Skynet machine combination of Bob Ross and Chuck Norris were built? It would rule the universe with a soft spoken fan brush of kung fu dominance
It would be truly incredible. I hope we are blessed with this being in our lifetime.
Oh i forgot. I hit on a mentally challenged girl too.
Just saw a squirrel crossing the road in a crosswalk..my morning has improved exponentially.
my mothers day present is going to be not puking at the table during brunch
Just ordered a clown who does balloon animals. No backing out now.
She sucks dick like Beethoven on piano, but talking to her is like Simple Jack in Tropic Thunder. Still working out the pros vs cons list.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
I am compiling a playlist that reminds me of all my best sexual encounters. It shall be called THE MUSIC OF MY VAGINA'S PEOPLE
It's really not cool dreaming about going into labor with your ex boyfriends love child as you're sleeping next to him.
that's right. bitches got laser pointers. let's fuck shit up
I don't care who you bring as long as they are fun and not a cop
You will bone me until my eyeballs fall out. This is not a request.
Woke up with a $50 attached to my penis with a rubber band..
Sweet. Tell little Richard to buy us a sack and a pizza.
Donald Trump looks like someone photoshopped hair onto a dick pic.
We made a blanket fort in my dorm room and fucked in it. Twice. I'm in love.
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