My mind said no, but my drink said yes.
After 4 hours of foreplay he passed out and almost immediately peed in my bed. Naked. Like a fountain. Then tried to deny it in the morning by saying he just sweats a lot.
I gave him a handjob while watching the presidential address. Needless to say, it was weird.
Do you not remember you showing everyone in the bathroom your period stained underwear? I'd say you were pretty happy it came
At least drunk you showered before switching sex partners last night.
please come home... she's showing me videos of spanish parrots and is telling me about her dead cousin...
I can't take any time off so I'll be here drinking mimosas til I puke at home with my kitty
he said he did everything he could to puke on his nurses because they were doing everything wrong
Thats admirable.
of course we called 911. an innocent mans booze was at steak
I just put vodka in my apple sauce. Spice up your fucking life.
the last i saw he was butt naked on the top deck of the bus trying to conduct a drunken choir so i really have no idea
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
We’ve discussed sex and dinner. Like chicken nuggets while doing it doggie and watching tv.
Live it up bro, they're always so surprised to find out you use magnums, being such a tiny man and all. It's a good thing.
if anyone breaks out the olive oil & slip n slide, text me 911.
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