I feel like I should limit myself to one meal prepared from a box per day
you were passed out snoring, face down with all your clothes still on and 20 minutes later you sat up and said "FUCK YES" and then passed out again.
I'd really appreciate it if we could dress up as pilgrims and indians for the thanksgiving eve bar crawl
The bouncer was kicking me out and I put up my finger for him to wait while I chugged the rest of my drink..all he could say is "are you serious right now?"
Fuckbuddy couldn't meet, so she's trying to find a substitute to come fuck me. Best. Fuckbuddy. Ever.
i keep looking at my boobs and it just baffles me how he could give this up.
I mean, I can get to know him eventually. The time frame doesn't really matter. I'll have sex with him regardless of whether he's interesting or not.
Cory and I accidentally had a sexual adventure last night.
How do you ACCIDENTALLY have a sexual adventure?
My dick pics could make it to the popular page on Instagram.
I wanna eat mushrooms and cuddle with a million dogs at once. I wanna know what heaven is like
First non virgin Sunday. Bursts into flames.
I woke up with your bra on, and some guys boxers. I'm in a random truck, in the middle of nowhere...
MANIFESTATION IS REAL AND IM GETTING LAID TONIGHT
The viagra-rita was a sexual success and a furniture failure. He said it was the best cowgirl sex he’s ever had even with the broken couch
He passed out while I was riding him but stayed hard long enough for me to orgasm. He definitely earned the blow job I’m going to wake him up with in the morning!
Randomize
