remind me next year to leave the 19 year old girl at home when you're going to pride. total cock block
you refused to leave the drive-thru at mcdonalds until the cashier took a jello shot
is it customary for a bride to wear white even if she's a whore? i feel tie-dye would have been more accurate
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
I don't want to talk about it but I will say, that was the best two headed $68 blowjob. Ever.
Jesus christ how hard is BRING SNACKS AND DRUGS to interpret? I trust your judgement on this one.
Its like a zucchini between his legs. An orgasmic zucchini.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
I'll be there in a few.
I'M COUNTING TO FEW.
Went to work in the same clothes from last night, completely covered in glitter...I didn't choose the hag life, the hag life chose me
We're fucking and Lee Greenwood God Bless the USA comes on and he came. It was the most Roll Tide America moment of my life.
This is like the first time all week I've properly taken my birth control. My ovaries are so stoked I just know it.
My friends say stay away from him but it’s still 2017 so I’m allowed to make shit decisions until midnight hahah
I need to show you how I feel about you by fucking you repeatedly.
Love it. I wish you see me right now. I'm counting cash on my bed with no shirt on, beauty and the beast sound track on blast. Fucking creepin it up.
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