it felt great physically, but AWFUL morally.
"Shots" has been nominated for a grammy. Now all of the US has sunken to our level...
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
I just sent a friend request to someone saying that i was the girl he shared a fifth of jager with last week. Thats something special. He better accept.
the potatoes in the margarita machine wasn't the breaking point. its when he turned on the stove and put a bunch of bottle rockets on it that i knew the night had prematurely failed
I've decided I want to blow you wearing a santa hat.
Aren't rabbit ears more seasonally appropriate?
dude to be honest with you there is a used condom that ive just left on my floor for three days
you have got to get your shit together
No, just kidding. But your faith in me to throw a lesbian bridal shower makes me think I an pull it off. To the LGBT bar!
Besides the one of you shaking your cock for 10sec that was one of the best snapchat's ever haha
There's going to be a velveeta shortage. I'm not drunk any more, this is just dire info.
They put me in room 420 every time and I take bubble baths and smoke in the room and they bring food TO MY BED
Question: When you have the names of 4 guys tattoo'd on you, how do you make the 5th one real special?
She puked in the bed, peed in the closet, and woke up on a Rubbermaid in the closet under the stair case
It’s like my vagina just knows when a man is a barrel-chested freedom fighter.
The party pretty much ended once she shit on the couch
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