Just heard "Kiss Me Though the Phone" for the first time. Amazed how it took Soulja Boy two songs to become a shitter version of Ja Rule.
Dude it was weird. The strippers vagina tasted kind of like your mother's.
His health insurance plan WILL NOT cover Lasix surgery but it WILL cover 100% of a penis enlargment operation...
I'll bring the barf blanket just in case.
I don't care. I'll be that guy that eats cake in a car. Alone. With the doors locked.
I swallowed for you. Answer the phone.
Had mirculous sex while watching miracle. Until she got mad that I kept quoting the movie. Not my fault I'm a good multi-tasker
Do you believe in miracles?
Saw a girl lying on her back next to a fire hydrant. Not sure if passed out drunk or sleeping under the stars
wait nvm its a dude
Worst date ever. Bro she asked when we can start having kids because her clock was ticking.
Run dude. Just run
She's in it for that fear factor ya'll. Obsession and stalking or nothing.
will a lunchtime blow job make it better?
Hope you’re getting action boo.
Definitely no. I woke up next to a bag of McDonald's.
All I remember is me taking my automatic nerf gun getting on top of him and saying..."look whos in control now!"
I think I kinda scared him when I tried to wrap his snake around his dick while he was trying to nap.
OH DEAR GOD IT GOT IN MY MOUTH AGAIN HELP
Randomize