im ready to get crazy and take my wig off
I want to have your abortion
my sex list reads like a who's who of mcdonald's general managers
a lady just got escorted out of the bar because she came in carrying a can of gasoline while smoking a cigarette....this place is the definition of class
the only sentence i could make out from her was "i will wash these herpes away"
im honestly just eating salsa and looking at his penis
Turned out the thing on the lampshade was a bloodstain, not a bedbug. We feel much safer now.
I vaguely remember telling a bum she was worth more than this
I wish I was a power ranger. Also the universe is immense. Like it never ends. Never.
Doug will be the one to get my vagina. I don't know when or how but I'm now declaring that it is his. And he better not disappoint.
Sensing a theme here
If alcoholism is a theme, yes.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
He's on the porch naked. Help.
Blueberry probiotics greatly increase to the masturbation experience. Try it dude. It’s all the rage
I visited the library for the first time in my college career tonight and I got laid. I think I'm gonna come back...
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